Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Bringing Christmas Home


I blogged a few days ago that this year it just doesn't feel like Christmas...for a number of reasons. The fact is, though, that our second year of marriage has been a trying one for my wife and I. Not because our relationship is that bad, or anything like that. But on two occasions this year (and one last year) we went through the pain and loss of a miscarriage. Now, I know there are people who have lost loved ones and part of me feels bad even mentioning what we've been through. But for a young family with hopes and dreams of bringing a new life into the world, these losses have been difficult. We've also endured some unexpected health problems and have been searching for answers from people who know a lot more than we do.

Well, since our home hasn't really felt "Christmasy", I knew bringing Christmas to our house rested with me. Due to a number of factors, we aren't financially where we were a couple of years ago, so getting excited about Christmas wasn't easy. But reluctantly, I stopped by the storage building on my way home Monday night and picked up our tree, some lights, and some decorations. As I walked into the house, I was reminded of Clark Griswold in National Lampoons Christmas Vacation. At one point when the family Christmas disaster has reached its climax and everyone is about to get in their cars (or RVs) and drive home, Clark goes on a tyrade and says that no one is going anywhere. Then he makes a very emotional statement saying that "We are going to have the happ-happ-happiest (*expletive*) Christmas since Bing Crosby danced with Danny (*expletive*) Kaye! When the smoke cleared, everyone stuck around and they truly had a happy Christmas.

In some ways, this year, I felt like I forced Christmas on my family (much like Clark Griswold). But now that we've decorated, it feels like Christmas in our house and our hearts are lighter. What's striking to me was that maybe we weren't really in the mood to have Christmas, but we chose celebrate the season for what it is. While Christmas is a holiday, I think a lot of things that are religious in nature need to be done deliberately, even when we are not in the mood. And what usually happens is that our hearts are blessed in the process. But if we only do what we are in the "mood" for, we can miss out on a tremendous blessing.

1 comment:

Craig Harris said...

Jason,
Thanks for sharing. You are right on track that we have to be deliberate as a family to make memories, create our own traditions, and make sure God is worshiped and respected in our homes. We base our faith on the facts, not just on our feelings. My prayer is for a blessed 2010 for you and your family. Oh and, BTW, please never feel you have to apologize that your suffering is not "as bad" as someone else's.